I am no numerology expert, but I know enough to figure out that 2022 adds up to 6. The sixth trump of the Major Arcana in tarot is The Lovers, so 2022 is the Year of The Lovers. How fabulous! That, and with Valentine’s Day upon us this week (a double whammy!), I thought it might be timely to write about love.
As tarot readers we spend a lot of time talking about love. I would confidently say that 80% of my clients come to see me to seek clarity on matters of love and relationships. Usually they will coyly mention a few other things first, like “seeking guidance” or “oh, just a general reading please”, but when pressed they really just want to enquire about love. Do you see someone for me in my future? Will she come back to me? Is he my soul mate?
For me, to love is to recognize the divine in another person. It is a spiritual experience and as such, a tarot reading is a wonderful way to explore its complexities and subtleties.
By far, the most common question asked is, “Will I meet my soulmate soon?” I’m happy to explore this question, but I like to come from a position of empowerment for my client. Many believe that the answer to that question is out of their control and somehow in the hands of fate. I disagree. We have free will to choose what direction we take. We create our reality. You haven’t met someone special? What are you currently doing that is discouraging this? What can you actively do to encourage or enable this?
Not long ago I had a client ask me the “soulmate” question. She lives with OCD and rarely leaves the house. I gently told her that Prince/Princess Charming was not going to come knocking on the front door. The cards told her she needed to make connections. She left with “homework” to join like-minded OCD chat groups and to start looking for the new apartment she had been thinking about for months. Change her environment. Occupy her mind. Shift her trajectory. The tarot gave her a blow by blow road map to follow. It was up to her to find the courage to see it through.
On occasion I get asked about exes. Are they happy with their new love? Do they think about me? Or recently, “Are they going to suffer for what they did to me?” Whoah! Seriously? Nah uh! I’m not going there. That’s none of your business. Having a compassionate discussion about why this is of no concern to them can be challenging but turning it around and encouraging the client to look at themselves and why they are still so angry usually works. Sometimes though, I can’t help but feel like they are so obsessed they will simply seek out a tarot reader who is willing to cross those boundaries. I won’t.
To love and be loved is the meaning of life. Love manifests in as many ways as there are humans on the earth, yet for an experience that is so universal, it remains complex and confusing for many individuals.
Recently I read for a client who had a torrid affair with his best friend’s wife. He felt that he no longer loved his own wife and was tormented by the extraordinary passion he felt for this other woman, who no longer wanted to continue the relationship. He loved her. I laid out the cards, and so began an in-depth discussion about what love was. We talked and unravelled. He extended his one hour reading by another half hour. He confessed that he had been unfaithful to his wife again two years earlier.
The cards showed that he was addicted to the adrenaline and lust of a clandestine liaison which he saw as love. We discussed how romantic love didn’t have to be consuming and tormenting. It can be quiet and steadfast. It can be as simple as your loved one quietly doing the dishes when they know it’s your turn. We unpacked a great deal around his childhood and I was pleased when he agreed to see a psychologist to delve deeper into his need for crazy and unattainable love.
Love is a bottomless well within us. Many parents have the experience when expecting their second child of doubting that they could ever have the capacity to love another offspring as fervently as their first. Ah, but without exception, the heart grows and love multiplies. It cannot be contained. Consider the Rider Waite Smith, Ace of Cups. A chalice overflowing with divine love and emotion. I like to think of this vessel as infinitely flowing, as is our capacity to love.
Usually it is the combination of cards present in a spread that provides the most informative love reading, however there are a myriad of cards in the tarot that represent different forms of love that I am always keen to see in a love reading. These might include:
The Lovers – inherently a card about choice. Who or what do you choose to love, above someone or something else? A harmonious union where the whole is greater than the parts and the individuals are empowered by their lover.
Two of Cups – the flow of love between two people. A union of souls. A partnership with a lover, friend or business associate.
Ten of Cups and Ten of Pentacles – the love within a family context.
Knight of Cups – an offer of love. The classic romantic who is in touch with their intuition and emotions and isn’t afraid to use them to charm your socks off.
Four of Wands – a celebration around love. Parties, weddings and events. Home, security and feeling safe. Who makes you feel secure?
Any experienced tarot reader will tell you that one person’s definition of love and “I love you” might mean something quite different to another’s. Our goal as readers is to listen with compassion and seek to interpret what our client is really asking when they say, “Will I find love”?
Denia Ferraro is a committee member of the Tarot Guild of Australia and also a Professional Member of the Guild.
Denia is based in Melbourne, Australia and can be reached through her website www.tarotden.com.au
The Lovers – Light Seers Tarot, by Chris-Anne – Published by Hay House
Two of Cups – Everyday Witch Tarot, by Deborah Blake and Elisabeth Alba – Published by Llewellyn Worldwide
Ten of Cups – Everyday Tarot, by Brigit Esselmont & Eleanor Grosch – Published by Perseus
Knight of Cups – Modern Love Tarot, designed by Ethony and illustrated by Lucy Morningstar
Ace of Cups – Radiant Rider-Waite Tarot, by Arthur Waite – Published by U.S. Games Systems Inc.
Four of Wands – Everyday Witch Tarot, by Deborah Blake and Elisabeth Alba – Published by Llewellyn Worldwide